Chosen by God to become holy

What is the family called to? Saint Paul answers by saying that God «chose us before the creation of the world to be holy and immaculate in his sight in charity» (Eph 1:3-4). Therefore, every Christian couple and family must rediscover in the sacrament of Marriage, which constitutes and establishes it, its innate and inescapable vocation to holiness: a vocation that is expressed and fulfilled not outside married life, but within the many realities and various duties of marriage.

Holiness: a call for everyone

What is holiness? Chapter V of Lumen Gentium, one of the most important documents of the Second Vatican Ecumenical Council, declares the universal call to holiness for everyone; it clearly states that in the Church all the faithful are called to holiness, and no one is excluded (nos. 39-40).
Pope Francis never tires of encouraging us in this regard: «To be holy it is not necessary to be bishops, priests, religious men or women. Very often we are tempted to think that holiness is reserved for those who have the possibility of keeping their distance from ordinary occupations, in order to devote much time to prayer. It is not so. We are all called to be holy by living with love and offering each our own testimony in our daily occupations, wherever we are. [….] Are you married? Be holy by loving and caring for your husband or wife, as Christ did with the Church. Are you a worker? Be holy by carrying out your work with honesty and competence in the service of your brothers and sisters. Are you a parent, grandmother or grandfather? Be holy by teaching children patiently to follow Jesus» (Gaudete et Exsultate,14). 
Holiness does not come only through extraordinary actions or experiences, but is achieved in ordinary life, and everyone is called to become holy wherever they are.

Daily growth in baptismal grace

For all Christians, then, the path to holiness is a daily growth in baptismal grace that leads us to progressively identify with Christ. Holiness therefore consists in facing daily life and its commitments starting from Christ and his Word. We must therefore make room for time for prayer, because it means cultivating a presence - that of the Father - as well as for the Eucharist, in order to offer the Lord our lived experience so that he may transform it. We must also recognize the importance of living out charity as a sign of true openness to life, and of looking to Mary and the saints as models, so that we can understand that what the Gospel tells and asks of us is possible to achieve.
So, we are not born saints; we become saints day after day through commitment and effort, certain that we never walk alone and that we are always sustained by God's grace.

Holiness in the family 

But is holiness in the family possible? Can the family become a path to holiness? By creating the couple, God revealed to humanity that he exists in communion, a communion realized by the spouses through the sacrament of marriage, which becomes a gift for the Church and the world. 
In Amoris laetitia, Pope Francis says that «the sacrament of marriage is not a social convention, an empty rite, or merely the outward sign of a commitment. The sacrament is a gift for the sanctification and salvation of the spouses» (no. 72), and in the final chapter he states: «A well-lived family communion is a true path of sanctification in ordinary life and of mystical growth, a means of intimate union with God» (no. 316). 
What is the central element that defines this path? It is conjugal love. The couple is called to grow in love so that this love may increasingly reveal and bear witness to God's love.
Therefore, holiness passes through what is specific to married and family life: relationships and communion, love received and given, fruitfulness and the education of children, care for the elderly, hospitality and concern for the poor, prayer and domestic liturgy, mercy and forgiveness, the grace of always starting again, and the courage to remain faithful in joy and in sorrow, in health and in illness.

Examples of family holiness

The fact that family holiness can be attained is testified to by many couples: the Church proposes them as reliable models of life to encourage families to follow Jesus Christ faithfully and actively, living out their marital vocation with authenticity and consistency. 
First of all, the spouses Luigi and Zelia Martin, parents of Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, canonized on October 18, 2015, and the spouses Luigi and Maria Beltrame Quattrocchi, beatified in 2001. We also remember the venerables Domenica and Sergio Bernardini, the servants of God Ulisse and Lelia Amendolagine, Anna Maria and Marcello Inguscio, Francesco and Teresa Savilli, Rosetta and Giovanni Gheddo. 
These couples lived their married life as a path toward holiness. It was an almost always everyday holiness, made up of small gestures, prayers, and great charity toward those in need and the most vulnerable. They lived the Gospel to the full, making it their daily journal.

Points for reflection as a couple/as a family

• Becoming holy “each in their own way”: it is God’s call to become the best version of ourselves. What particular gifts has God given me?
• God “guides us to become holy”: when have I felt guided on this journey toward holiness?
• Have there been events, encounters, or opportunities that have improved me or improved our family?